


The Mars Bar

by Linger1536



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Harry's and Dudley's children meet, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-02
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-19 04:10:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8189248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Linger1536/pseuds/Linger1536
Summary: Three Potters and a Weasley encounter a Dursley.Lily's eyes flickered to the door and once she saw who it was a wicked grin spread out across her face. "Ooh, look who it is," she whispered, "it's your admirers, Louis!"James swirled around in his chair with his spoon still in his mouth as he sucked off the remaining caramel, to stare at the new arrivals. "That blonde one looks like she's about to jump you," he chortled





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is taken from my story Regrets on ff net, you do not need to read it to read this.
> 
> Backstory: I lived in Edinburgh for two months last year and that's when I encountered a deep fired Mars Bar which I of course deemed disgusting and promptly refused to try despite my friends urging me to. A few weeks ago when I was back there a couple of things happened which ended up with me trying one, and that of course inspired me to write this. Enjoy!

"Nah, I'm telling you now Lily that Dad wouldn't want one of those... those-things!" A nineteen year old James Potter exclaimed with a look of disgust on his face.

A pretty red haired girl about a head shorter than James rolled her brown eyes at his antics. "Have you actually tried one before, James?"

James wrinkled his nose with disdain as he inspected the sweet his sister was holding out to him "No."

Lily let out a light laugh and tossed her long hair over her shoulders, where it fell against the back of her white jacket. "Well then how would you know if you like one or not?"

James pointed at the sweet in question and gave his sister a baffled expression. "For starters it's called a Mars Bar- Mars Bar, who came up with that? The centaurs would have their tails in knots if they found out.!

The girl shrugged her shoulders in response. "Muggles."

There was a slight muffled sound coming from somewhere behind a shelf and both siblings heads turned towards it but they saw nothing.

"You know," said James as he glanced around the shop, "they have the weirdest things."

"James!" chided Lily. "Our grandmother was a muggle-born."

James shrugged his shoulders and tossed a couple of Mars Bars into the basket Lily was holding. "Was there anything else we needed?"

Lily frowned, looking at the rows of sweets she wasn't familiar with. "Did Dad mention any other sort he liked?"

James shook his head. "I dunno. They wouldn't let him have any, remember?" His face darkened as he murmured some rather rude words under his breath.

Lily's eyes lit up. "We should get him one of each!"

A grin spread across James's face as his eyes – which were the same shade bright brown as his sister's – lit up with excitement. "Brilliant!"

A couple of minutes later the basket was filled with all kinds of sweets and the two siblings were displaying equivalent grins as they strode up the cashier, a bored looking guy around James's age with a face full of pimples. He raised a dark eyebrow at their purchase but didn't comment on it, instead telling them the price.

"A pound is the one with..." Lily mumbled as she stared down at the coins in her hand, shovelling them around.

James peered over her shoulder and reached around her, gathering what he assumed was the right amount of money and handed it to the guy.

They bagged the sweets and headed for the exit, neither of them noticing the intent stare of an elderly, pale blue-eyed woman, who was watching them from the queue, perhaps it was because the siblings had grown so accustomed of people staring at them wherever they went.

"You know," Lily mused as she came to a halt outside the shop, peering down into the bag of sweets, "we could enchant some of these and try them out on the cousins.

James's eyes sparkled with mischief as he let out a delighted laugh. "We should! They'd never expect anything when it's muggle sweets."

Lily smirked at her brother. "Sort of like that time Fred and I had you try a Love Cupcake."

James's smile faltered slightly as he remembered the incident which had taken place during his final year at Hogwarts, when he foolishly enough had accepted a cupcake from Lily as the Gryffindors celebrated winning a quidditch match. He had been running around for about three hours spouting love poems until it wore off.

James glowered as Lily laughed at his expression. "You little Erkling!" he exclaimed, lunging at her. "I still haven't forgiven you for that!"

Lily howled with laughter as James attacked her sides and began tickling her until tears rolled down her cheeks.

"Stop!" she gasped, dropping the bag of sweets which caused a Mars Bar to fall out.

James ignored his sister's pleas instead picking her up and throwing her over his shoulders – the way he used to do when she was little – spinning them around. Lily's hair whipped around them, shimmering with different shades of red as it caught the sunlight.

"You're such a baby!" Lily laughed as her brother picked up the pace.

James chuckled and prepared to do an ever quicker spin but he came to a sudden halt when he happened to look up to find an elderly woman standing at the entrance of the shop, staring at them with bewildered eyes.

"What are you doing, you big- Oh!" Lily exclaimed as she pushed herself up so that she could peer over her shoulder, catching a glimpse of the lady. "Put me down, James."

James slid her off his shoulders and she made to pick up the bag of sweets but the woman beat her to it. Lily could see roots of grey in her blond hair and by observing the wrinkles formed on her face she assumed that she would be around that same age her grandmother would have been if she had lived.

The woman straightened and handed Lily the bag but she stalled when she glanced down at the Mars Bar. Her fingers closed around it and her eyes fluttered closed, obscuring the flash of emotion in them.

James took a step closer to the woman and gave Lily a confused glance as he did so, which she responded with one of her own. "Are you all right?"

"Huh?" the woman mumbled, now staring at the Mars Bar with solemn eyes.

"Are you all right?"

"Oh, yes, quiet all right," she replied, although James did not think she looked like it.

The woman's eyes suddenly snapped up to meet James's and her thin, carefully sculpted eyebrows came together as she stared at him with a look of... penitence. James, baffled by the woman's odd behaviour turned his head slowly in Lily's direction, raising one eyebrow, silently asking: "What's with this nutter?"

Lily regarded the woman curiously, taking notice of how she still held the sweet tightly in her hand. "Would you like to have it?"

"P-pardon?" The woman gaped at her with puzzled eyes.

Lily took a small step forwards so that she came to stand next to James. She discreetly pinched his arm – a silent form of communication she, Albus and James had developed when situations such as this one became something they wanted to escape – before giving the woman a strained smile.

"You can keep it if you like." She gestured at the sweet and the woman glanced down at it.

"Oh," she whispered, "No, thank you."

She handed Lily the Mars Bar and Lily took notice of her hand shook with slight tremors. James had also taken notice of this and casually threw an arm around Lily's shoulder while he used his free hand ruffled his dark unruly hair – a gesture which seemed casual, but to anyone who knew him it was a nervous one.

"Well," he said, "we should get going, right Lils?"

Lily nodded but her eyes remained focused on the woman. "Right... we don't want to be late for the party," she said referring to their dad's birthday party. "I'm sure Al has already gotten the other gifts."

James gave the woman an uncertain nod before turning around, leading Lily to the back of the shop where they could apparate unnoticed. Lily peeked around the corner and saw that the woman had remained where they had left her, staring after them.

"Odd," she mumbed.

James nodded in agreement and grabbed hold of Lily's arm. "All that for one of those Mars Bars."


	2. Chapter 2

James Potter was having a jolly good time, even though he wouldn't remember much of it the coming day. His siblings and his cousin Louis along with himself had decided to escape London and its scrutiny for the weekend which why they were currently seated in a ghost pub located in Edinburgh's Old Town.

"This place is brilliant!" Lily exclaimed as she stared around the room with glossy eyes, taking in the dark stone corridor filled with tables shaped like coffins and the sign which told the story of the little girl that was supposed to haunt the pub.

"I knew you would like it," James's girlfriend Ivy said smugly in a thick Scottish accent.

"Of course she would," said Albus as he tipped his glass back to take a sip of his drink. "Lily loves these kind of things."

Lily paid him no mind and instead spun around in her seat so that she had a better view of the room.

"Which is strange," Louis noted, "considering that Lily grew up as a witch."

Lily rolled her eyes at him and turned her attention to her brother's girlfriend -who was seated opposite her and said brother- with a wicked gleam in her eye. "Say Ivy, did you know that James has never tried a deep fried Mars Bar?"

Ivy's eyes widened over the rim over her Strongbow glass. "W-what" she sputtered, attempting to swallow the liquid.

Albus who was seated next to the short brunette turned to her and grinned. "You should have heard him complaining about it when they got some for Dad's birthday." He looked at James with taunting green eyes. "What was it you said again? Oh right! It was the most disgusting thing ever."

"James!" Ivy admonished, her hazel eyes were wide with disbelief as she slammed her glass down slightly too hard on the table.

James, who was shooting his brother a withering look, grimaced slightly at his girlfriend's tone, but curled his lips into a smirk as he stared at her across the table. "The thing is, Darling-"

"The funny thing is that he never actually tried one," said Louis cutting James off. He shook his head which caused a few strands of shimmering blond hair to fall into his cerulean eyes, a low sigh could be heard from the booth next to them where a couple of girls was staring longingly at him.

"I quite liked them," Lily told them as she leaned back in her seat, enjoying how flustered her brother had become.

"Of course you did!" said Ivy. "Everyone loves them." she quieted down, tapping her fingers against her glass while biting down on her lower lip, which had her boyfriend attempting to shrink down in his seat. He knew that look... and it did not bode well.

Ivy cocked her head to the side, her long hair cascading down her back in a slightly tangled mess. "Louis, you've never been here before either," she said, ignoring the bemused glance Lily shot her.

Louis brought a cigarette to his mouth and leaned in closer to her over the table, rolling it between his lips. "Nope."

Ivy smirked, her red plump lips twitching as she brought out her lighter and lit his cigarette. "Then you and Lily need a tour," she said gesturing wildly at their surroundings.

She got up, paying no mind to the suspicious look her boyfriend shot her, and the slightly disappointed one she received from his sister.

Louis scooted out of the boot and turned to her with a charming smile. "Lead the way."

"Right, c'mon Lily!" She turned towards the doorway which led into a dark tunnel that was lined with more tables, but stopped before she had gotten too far and turned back to the two Potter brothers. "James," she said, running a hand through his messy curls, "be a darling and get me another drink."

"Yeah," said Lily from next to Ivy, "get me one of those... what's it called? Coke and rum, rum and coke? Oh, you know what I mean!"

"You still owe me money, Lily!" James hollered after her as she and Louis followed Ivy into the corridor, but all he received was the flick of her wrist as she waved him off.

Ivy led them through the corridor, ignoring the scuffling of feet and giggles coming from behind them as she showed them the adjoined rooms. She veered to the right and brought them down a set of stone steps from which live music could be heard.

"This place is mad!" Louis exclaimed as they swayed to the music and watched the other people in the room dance.

Ivy smirked. " It's right up your alley then?" She peered over her shoulder and saw the four girls who had been seated in the booth next to them coming down the steps, all of them staring hungrily at Louis.

"James loves it, especially the part about how it's supposed to be haunted," she laughed remembering the many times he had decided to do a little magic to make it seem as if it there really was a ghost. The one time they had decided to use Harry's invisibility cloak at the pub would forever be engraved in her mind.

"I'm not surprised," Louis told her as he flicked his eyes across the room, pointedly ignoring the group of girls now standing in a corner close to them, whispering and giggling amongst themselves.

Both Ivy and Lily looked at them and they quickly quieted down, but continued to stare at the two of them, now shooting them daggers.

Lily raised one perfectly sculpted eyebrow at them and leaned closer to Louis resting against his side. He wrapped an arm around her in a brotherly fashion although it must not have seemed so to the girls because the larger one out of the group was particularly fuming, her chubby cheeks turning a deep crimson shade which clashed awfully with her blonde hair.

Ivy bit the inside of her mouth to keep herself from laughing and met the redhead's eyes who simply smirked at the older girl.

"There's a cinema as well," she informed them to which they both raised their eyebrows in surprise. "They mostly show these really lousy films, but hey it's free so you can't really complain."

She showed them the small cinema which was devoid of any occupants except for a tall guy with orange dreads who was munching on crisps, and a group of three people seated in the back.

"Man," whispered Louis, shaking his head in disbelief, "Grandad would love this!"

"Yeah," Lily agreed as she peered in through the door," although he would probably try to pick it apart."

Ivy laughed and began heading back to the others, but she stopped once in the corridor. "So this is the plan-"

"I knew you had a plan!" Lily exclaimed with a broad grin.

Ivy nodded and her eyes sparkled with mischief. "We need to get James pissed, and then I'll suggest getting something to eat which is when we'll get him a deep fried Mars Bar."

* * *

 

_"Groove around like a scary ghost-"_

"James..."

_"-spooking himself the most-"_

"Shh!"

_"-shake your booty like a boggart in pain-"_

"James, c'mon."

_"-AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN!"_

"James please shut up!"

They we're walking down North Bridge, a light drizzle was falling in the warm summer air as they headed for the New Town. Ivy was struggling to keep her very intoxicated boyfriend under control whilst his younger siblings was walking behind them, not even attempting to muffle their laughter.

_"Get it on like an angry spectre-"_

"Seriously, James."

He stopped singing in a split second and turned to her with a cheeky grin. "You got them wrong."

She blinked up at him confused. "What?" she asked as she wrapped on of her arms more securely around his waist and gripped more tightly at the arm which was slung over her shoulders.

"You," he said leaning closer, swaying slightly, "got it wrong." He grinned even wider, his brown eyes filled with amusement. "It's James Sirius, not Sirius James."

Lily burst out laughing from behind them, meanwhile Ivy couldn't resist to let out a loud groan.

Louis fell into step with them, shaking his head at his cousin before taking hold of him and relieving Ivy of his weight, most of which she had been supporting. "C'mon, Seriously James."

Ivy fell back so that she was walking next to Albus and Lily. "Remind me to never let James drink Tequila again."

"Duly noted," said Albus.

"Are you joking?" Lily asked looking from the two of them to her oldest brother who was now attempting to get Louis to do these goofy side steps down the pavement which was attracting a lot of attention from the other people on the street. "It's hilarious!"

Ivy opened her mouth about to reply. "I-"

_"CAN YOU DANCE LIKE A HIPPOGRIFF?"_

_"MA MA MA MA MA MA MA MA MAAAAA!"_

* * *

 

"I'm not doing it!" James declared.

He had frozen immediately once he had realised that he was being dragged towards a dingy restaurant (if you even could call it that) with a bright neon sign that proudly read "DEEP FRIED MARS BAR"

"Stop being such a baby James!" Lily said as she pushed the door open and escaped the hustle and bustle of the street outside.

James planted his feet promptly onto the stone pavement and refused to move, Ivy slipped up to him and hooked one arm through his while Louis took hold of the other. "You're such a drama queen sometimes," she told him laughing.

Albus was already standing by the cashier when the other three entered, ordering five deep fried Mars Bars.

"Could you throw in a regular one as well?" asked Ivy. "This one," she said nodding at James who was refusing to meet the cashier's eyes, "has never had one."

The woman, who had looked thoroughly fed up with her job, blinked, her blue eyes full of surprise as she drew her head back slightly. "You've never had a Mars Bar? Ever?"

Lily giggled loudly and her brother threw her a nasty look. "Apparently, I've been missing out on something amazing."

The woman shook her head as she rang up their order, tossing up a regular Mars Bar on the counter, which Albus snatched up before they took their seats.

Louis grabbed the sweet and broke it apart into five pieces, handing them out to everyone.

"Cheers!" said Albus popping it into his mouth.

Lily echoed her brother's sentiments, closing her eyes as she allowed the sweet chocolate to melt on her tongue.

Ivy popped her piece into her mouth and looked at her boyfriend expectantly. "Go on, James."

James ignored her and pushed the remaining piece of sweet towards Louis who had already devoured his. "Here you go, mate."

Louis simply shook his head. "Nah, I'm good," he said leaning back in his chair crossing his arms behind his head.

"James," said Ivy, her hand slipping onto his thigh as she leaned into him, brushing her lips against his ear while whispering something only he could hear.

James turned his head towards her, his glazed eyes regained some of their focus as he raised one dark eyebrow at her before popping the sweet into his mouth.

"Whatever that was," Lily began with a disgusted look on her face, "I don't ever want to know."

"And you never will," James told her before grimacing, "that was disgusting by the way," he said nodding at the now empty wrapper.

"Oh come off it!" Ivy exclaimed smacking his arm.

The cashier cleared her throat and they all looked over to see a five boxes with deep fried Mars Bars and icecream waiting for them.

"Brilliant," said Albus as he and Lily got up to get them. "Thank you!"

"James," Ivy began as she stabbed her Mars Bar with a fork, "if you don't like this, I'm afraid we're breaking up."

Lily who was wolfing hers down, snorted before taking a large bite of her icecream.

James scoffed before tentatively tasting some of his own. Ivy watched smugly as his eyes widened and as he reached forward to take a second bite.

"It's not that bad," he declared which had the whole table erupting into laughter.

"I thought so," said Ivy.

"It's a lot better than the first one you made me try," he said around a mouthful.

Albus who had already finished his grinned. "We should get Dad one of these sometime." He reached out with his own fork towards James's box but James quickly pulled it out of reach.

"Get your own!"

There was the jingling of the door being opened as James finished what was left of his Mars Bar.

Lily's eyes flickered to the door and once she saw who it was a wicked grin spread out across her face. "Ooh, look who it is," she whispered, "it's your admirers, Louis!"

Louis didn't turn around, instead he slumped further down into his chair, pulling out another cigarette from his pocket, along with a blue lighter Ivy had given him for occasions such as this. "Bloody fantastic."

James swirled around in his chair with his spoon still in his mouth as he sucked off the remaining caramel, to stare at the new arrivals. "That blonde one looks like she's about to jump you," he chortled, referring to the extremely overweight girl, who was staring at Louis through squinted eyes.

"C'mere Lils," Louis said, reaching out and dragging Lily's chair closer to him so that he could slip an arm over her thin shoulders.

Albus rolled his eyes at his cousin while James and Ivy exchanged a look, which had them both averting their eyes to keep from laughing.

"You seriously need to get a girlfriend, man," Al told Louis who was now toying with a piece of Lily's hair.

Louis shook his head. "Too much work, don't wanna be tied down."

Lily laughed and turned to her face to his but she was watching the blonde girl from the corner of her eye, waiting for a reaction. "Because this isn't too much work at all."

Louis grinned at her, leaning in and bumping his forehead with hers. "But that's why I've got you."

There was a loud scoff from behind them and both Louis and Lily took a quick peek over James's and Ivy's heads, which caused their eyes to become alight with amusement.

"You guys are so weird sometimes," Ivy told them, as she leaned into James's side, but she couldn't quite keep the laughter out of her voice.

Despite their six years age difference Louis and Lily had always the been closest out of the cousins, followed closely by James and Fred. Normally where one went the other one wouldn't be far behind, and they both thrived on causing chaos and equal amounts of drama, which was an endless amusement and more often than not a pain for their family.

"Oh, brilliant!" Lily murmured excitedly from the corner of her mouth, "she's coming over!"

James head perked up at this while Albus merely rolled his eyes, slumping back in his seat, simply content with watching everything unfold.

There was the loud sound of someone clearing their throat and both James and Ivy turned to look at the girl, who seemed to be around their age, and who was now staring at Louis and Lily with beady blue eyes. She cleared her throat a little louder when neither of them paid her any attention, they were both staring at Louis palm which Lily was tracing with her fingertips.

"Oh, dear, there seems to be a lot of trouble brewing in a near future for you," said Lily in a soft misty voice, which was such a perfect impersonation of Professor Trelawney that it had everyone around the table, with the exception of Louis, shaking with silent laughter.

"See this line here," Lily continued in the same misty voice, following a line across Louis's palm, "it-"

She was interrupted by a loud snort, coming from the blonde girl who was now glaring quite obviously at her.

Lily stopped her movements and looked up at the fuming girl. "Can I help you?" she asked, interlacing her fingers with Louis and placing their joined hands on the table.

"No, you most certainly can not," the girl quipped in a shrill voice, that didn't have the slightest trace of a Scottish accent.

"Then perhaps," Lily began with a voice full of contempt, "you should be on your way." She waved her hand in a shooing motion which had the blonde girl's eyes widening above her fat cheeks.

Louis smirked and leaned back in his seat.

"I don't have time for silly little girls like you," the blonde sneered.

"Certainly," said Lily with an evil glint in her eye, that her brothers had learned to fear, "just like we don't have time for hefty snobs such as you."

James let out a loud laugh and the blonde turned around, looking down her nose at him. "You should do something about that horrid hair of yours," she sneered.

"Bitch!" Ivy exclaimed just as James let out an indignant; "Hey!"

Louis who was taking immense pleasure in the drama unfolding in front of him finally looked up at the blonde, flashing her a smile. "Can I help you?"

She turned to him, a blush begun to creep up her short fat neck and onto her chubby cheeks. "Yes," she replied, her voice even shriller than it had been moments before. "I wanted to invite you to come out with me and my friends to this club called Mood."

Ivy snorted quietly and James looked down at her, raising one questioning eyebrow. "I hate that place," she mumbled.

Louis began to play with a piece of Lily's hair again as he contemplated his answer. "Sorry, but I'll have to pass."

The blonde remained where she was, her eyes flashing as she wrung her chubby hands which Lily now noticed was holding onto a napkin.

"What have you got there?" she asked nodding at it.

The blonde ignored her but smoothed the napkin out and took a step closer to Louis holding it out to him, from where he was seated James could see that she had scribbled something on it in an extravagant handwriting.

"What am I supposed to do with this?" asked Louis waving it in the air.

The blonde smiled. "Ring me of course," she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, "when you tire of this lot," she said looking down at Albus, James, Lily and Ivy.

"Fat chance," Louis laughed rather cruelly, pulling Lily closer who was now smirking at the blonde as she promptly turned around and rejoined her group of friends, all of whom quickly surrounded her, still giggling as they demanded information.

"Well," said Albus as he straightened up, "that was one of your poorer performances."

"Shut up!" both Lily and Louis said in unison.

"Oh, I dunno Al," Ivy interjected. "I quite liked watching her fume."

"Yeah," James agreed, "I was waiting to see which shade of red she would turn into next."

It was only when they all had begun to trudge towards Ivy's home that James remembered that there had been something scribbled on the napkin.

"Hey, Louis," he called out to his cousin, who was walking a few paces in front of him next to Albus. "What was written on that napkin you got?"

Louis stopped and pulled out the crumpled piece of paper from his pocket. "Dunno," he said tossing it to James, "do me favour and throw it in that bin over there."

But James wasn't listening instead he was staring down at the paper with his mouth slightly agape. "No way!" he breathed excitedly.

"What?" Ivy asked as she tried to catch a glimpse of it.

James chuckled. "Oh, this is gold!"

"Let me see!" Lily demanded.

James handed her the napkin and they all watched as her eyes widened with disbelief. "No!" she exclaimed excitedly.

Albus pulled it out of her grasp and held it so that he, Louis and Ivy could all see the number that was written on it, but it was the name above it that had captured all of their attention.

_Cecily Dursley_

Ivy who had heard all about her boyfriend's father's family, stared down at the name in amazement. "You don't think..."

"Of course it is!" Lily interrupted her. She turned to Louis, grinning. "You have to ring her!"

"Yeah!" James agreed, bouncing with excitement. "This going to be amazing!"

Louis shrugged, not nearly as excited by the thought. "I don't have one of those... whatever they're called."

James sobered up slightly. "Fuck, I forgot about that... well we need to get one then, how hard can it be? What?" he asked as Albus and Ivy shook their heads at him.

"James," Ivy said highly amused, "I'm a Muggle-born... which means I've got a mobile phone," she finished, waving it in front of him.

James didn't waste a second. "Give it here!"

He ripped it out of her hands and dragged Louis to the side of the pavement, Lily following them eagerly.

"How long do you think it takes until they realise they don't know how to use it?" Albus asked her, watching as the three of them prodded at it experimentally.

"Oh about five seconds," Ivy replied just as James shouted;

"Babe, how do you use this thing?!"


End file.
